Katelyn and I made plans to hang out with my friend Abby awhile back. I showed up at Abby's apartment and we hung out for a bit, waiting for Katelyn and our Chinese food. Abby asked if I wouldn't mind if she showered. Her oldest was at her grandmother's house so it was just the 2 1/2 year old twin girls. I told her I didn't mind.
It was a mistake.
As soon as Abby left the room, Twin One ran over to a lamp that I knew she shouldn't be touching, just because she gave me her best "What Are You Going To Do About It" look as she placed her hand squarely on the lamp.
Twin Two kept running up and hugging my legs, which I liked. Until she bit me.
Twin One heard me lecturing Twin Two that we don't bite people, so she ran over, gnashing her teeth, ready to bite down. Twin One thought that was hilarious and copied her sister. So I was holding the girls back, trying not to get bit, when the doorbell rang.
The Chinese food delivery guy had arrived. I turned around to get the money when I heard him say, "Uh, both girls just ran outside."
I ran outside and the girls were gone. Abby lives in an apartment complex so it was pretty terrifying. I sprinted to the end of the sidewalk and found Twin Two running for her life. I caught up with her, grabbed her arm, and looked around frantically for Twin One.
Twin One was nowhere to be found. Then I heard her laughing. She had run up the stairs and was above eye level. She was about halfway up and not very fast. My heart rate slowed down as I realized she had trapped herself. So I went back to Chinese food delivery guy, gave him the money, explained these weren't my children as he eyed me warily, shut Twin Two in the apartment and went to get Twin One.
Abby didn't even feel sorry for me. She just said, "That's the story of my life."
