Jett's Chicks

Sometimes my Mom gives me a project to do. It's hard to tell which ones she's serious about and which ones she's not. Sometimes I'm ready to go, and I tell her I'll come over on Saturday, and she's like, "Nah, never mind." So that keeps things interesting.

She recently got some chickens. She got a chicken coop from Costco and she wanted a sign for my little nephew Jett. She wanted an actual jet airplane on the sign. I thought that might be a little confusing, so I wanted to put his name in the jet.

I wanted to use the vinyl cut from my Silhouette machine as a stencil. So I painted everything white and the put down my stencil.

Due to a cutting error, there are two chicks that didn't cut out properly and were added later. That was the first problem.

You can buy transfer paper, but I read online that Glad's Press N Seal works just as well. And it does.

But it looked like crap. I was irritated. Problem two.

So I painted over it. And could still see the outline and it needed to be sanded.

So I sanded it, decided I liked the distressed look, and put the vinyl right on top. then I polyurethaned over the top so the vinyl wouldn't peel up. It is going outside.

Lilly the cat was not happy about her special napping place being my workspace.

Of course the board split when I screwed the (supposed to be self-drilling but it was LIES) screws. So I glued it and clamped it and left it overnight and that took care of problem three.

Conversations with Katelyn

Me: I am on my period and I am grumpy.
Katelyn (currently pregnant): You know, when you are pregnant, you don't have your period for a year.
Me: Yeah, but then you're stuck with a baby.
Katelyn: WE HAVE BEEN TRYING FOR SEVEN YEARS.
Me: I TOLD YOU I WAS GRUMPY.

Conversations with J

J and I were sitting on the couch. J was working on his computer and I was watching the Netflix show Grace and Frankie. It's about two women who don't like each other, but their husbands are business partners. And also gay lovers. So the first show starts with the two men meeting their wives in a restaurant and announcing that they are leaving their wives. A scene ensues.

Me: If you ever decide to leave me and you do it in a public restaurant, I will stab you with a fork.
J: (Hysterical laugher)

Me: Why are you laughing? This is serious.

J: Because I was waiting for you to say something! Whenever you watch a show or read a book where a man is being a jerk to a woman, you take it out on me.

Me: But you won’t ever leave me?

J: I won’t ever leave you.

Me: Promise? You won’t fall in love with your business partner Cody?

J: Ew. If I were gay, he’s not my type. Will Smith is my type. You know, hypothetically, and I’m not gay, this is just hypothetically…I’d like to think that if I were gay, we could still be friends.

Me: Yeah, I feel like we could still be best friends if that happened. Except I would be pissed with you because that meant you’d been lying the whole time.

J: I could have turned gay.

Me: YOU DON’T TURN GAY.

J: Hey, did you know one of our neighbors has a wifi name “Tell my wifi love her?”